6.06.2013

We're Moving

A lot of you don't know that I'm 17 years old. I live with my parents, two sisters, and brother. We have a nice house in the country with about 10 acres of land. We have a dog, I have a horse. {Yes, I can say I because I pay all of his food + vet bills.} 

I mean, it's not like you would have any way of knowing that I'm 17 + it's not exactly necessary... But I'm just sayin' - for future reference - YES, I'm a teenager. ;)

Anyway, A few months ago, the "moving talk" started in our house. Currently, we live about an hour from where my dad works and my mom commutes about 15 minutes to where she does. My younger sister, younger brother, and I commute about 15 minutes to our elementary/high school. My older sister attends college about 15 minutes in the opposite direction. We live in the middle of a lot of stuff in our area, and it's really pretty nice. To sum it up, I love it here and I've grown up here my entire life.

The attachment I have to our home is unlike anyone else's in my family. I believe that because our house burned down on my 10th birthday. We temporarily moved in with an aunt and uncle of ours, then into a 2 bedroom town home, and finally into our rebuilt and slightly renovated home on the same property it burned on. This property has always been the place I've called home.

When my parents first started the "moving talk," (the idea of my dad being closer to work, us being closer to school, downsizing a bit, etc.) I was ticked to say the least. I felt betrayed. Hurt. Scared. I didn't want to leave this place again knowing that it wasn't my decision and wasn't in the means of my control. In fact, I didn't want to leave it at all. This is the familiar. This is home.

Sure, we'll still be attending the same school. I'll still have all my friends. We'll still get to keep all of our furniture. Everything WILL be okay... It's just hard to move forward from something that you don't want to leave behind.

It took me a couple of weeks, many bad attitudes, and a few heart-to-heart's with my parents before I'm finally okay dealing with the idea of this whole thing. Let me just say, it's been a miserable few weeks... I've been up, down, and all around in terms of my mood. It's been hard.

The hardest part was coming home the other day and seeing that stupid sign at the end of the driveway. Ya know, the one with the realtor's face plastered on it. There was just something that made me feel it's all too real now.

I wanted to run away that day. Literally. But hanging out with one of my long time best friend's, Jaycee, really put it all into perspective for me. She and her family recently moved, too, and she gets it. Everything I told her about feeling attached to where we are now? She felt that way. She listened. She gave me advice on how to deal with it. She told me it'll all be okay. Ever since that talk, I HAVE felt that way. I've been okay.

Something about posting this today makes me a feel even more okay. I've been keeping it a real secret and I just want to have it out there so I can start dealing with it. I already know it's going to be a journey, but I also know it's nothing my family won't be able to handle. God has a plan for it.

And hey, if I get my own bedroom out of the deal, I won't argue too much... Ha! ;)

9 comments:

Teresa said...

We moved when I was 13. Same town, but maybe fifteen minutes away, to a bigger house. It was very difficult for me to leave my childhood home, and I remember laying on my bedroom floor (I shared with my two sisters at the time) and just sobbed all night. After a few months in the new house, it got better. Now, at 31 years old, I didn't get upset when my mom sold the "new" house. And you know what? I still have dreams of being in my very first home. :) So, just wanted to let you know that I get it! Also, I didn't know you were 17. You act very mature and write well! Have a great weekend.

Lauren said...

This totally reminds me of the Miranda Lambert song "The house that built me" ..... I totally get this!! But everything is and will be okay! Change is hard but a necessary part of life. You've got this. He's got this. Love ya!

JennaDK said...

Oh Kenz! I thought of Mirand's song "the house that built me" as well! Moving is hard but just think that soon you will be growing up yourself. My family moved my freshman year of high school but we only moved 1 mile from my old house. We really just needed a bigger house to grow in. Then when I turned 24 my parents told me it was time to move out! So what did I do I bought a house around the corner from my parents. All the memories you made in your house growing up will ALWAYS be there to reminsce on. My sister & I still talk about all our good times, bad times and even the times we made an imaginary line in our shared bedroom so the other wouldn't come into the others space!

Things will be fine & you'll make new memories with your family at this new house!

Jen said...

I can only imagine how hard this must be for you but I love that you are looking at the positive now. Hugs!

Meghan said...

I'm pretty sure that if my parents told me they were selling our house, I'd feel the same way!

Jessica said...

so sorry your moving. that sucks!

Hayley said...

I totally get how you are feeling. I am the youngest of 4 kids and we all live away from home now. But, I have lived in the same house my whole life. My parents have never moved in the 23 years I've been on this Earth. They have no plans to move any time soon but I won't be surprised if they eventually do. I know when that time comes, I will be so heartbroken. That's my HOME. That is where all of my memories are. It sad to think about if it were come to a close. I feel for you girl.

Also, I can't imagine my house burning down. That is so incredibly scary. Let me know if and how I can pray for you, girl!

Sarah at Midwest Pillowtalk said...

it is so hard to leave a home behind, especially one you have been in for so long! but i know youll cherish those memories in your heart and theyll always make you feel warm :) itll be fun to build more in a new home! and itll be nice to move WITH your family, rather than them moving away while youre away at college or something and returning to a new place. that would be yucky. i hope you love your new home and get your own bedroom out of it :)

Charise said...

Totally know EXACTLY how you're feeling! You probably already know, but I moved a year ago...2 hours AWAY from everything I'd known for 15 years. It has been super difficult, and although I don't know the real reasoning of why I was placed in this "season of life", I know it had to happen this way. It'll all be alright, girl. You'll always have the memories, but it is very hard to leave your home and something that you're so attached to.