February 16, 2013

I've Been Bought With A Price


I was talking to one of my new friends last night. A *boy* friend, that is. Take that however you want to... Ha!

We got on the subject of dating somehow and he ended up asking me,

"Have you had a lot of boyfriends?"

I'll be completely honest, I busted out laughing. My response was ,

"Do I LOOK like I've had a lot of boyfriends?"

My thoughts after that?

"Dude, you don't know how complicated I am. No boy would put up with this crazyness voluntarily."

I asked him why he thought that, but he wouldn't tell me. Imagine that. Oh, boys, boys, boys.

When I laid down to sleep, I kept thinking about it.

What did that really mean? 

Am I supposed to have a history of boyfriends?

So, naturally, I began to pray about it. I asked God what that meant and why I was feeling so distracted about a seemingly simple question. He put this verse in my heart:

Proverbs 4:23~ "Above all else, guard your heart, for it determines the course of your life."

I cannot even begin to describe the peace I felt after God put that on my heart. It's really quite amazing, actually, that He would give me that peace instantly. 

It made me feel like I'm doing something right. Without a doubt.

Even though that clarity alone would have been enough to put my overthinking to rest, God gave me MORE. Something BIGGER, something BETTER. Another verse that spoke straight to my heart...

1 Corinthians 7:23~ "You were bought at a price, so do not become enslaved by the world."

That's all too fitting considering how trapped I feel by the world sometimes and what everyone else is doing. This was a good reality check to me... Straight from the One who knows me better than I know myself. It made me really ask myself,

"Why haven't I had a boyfriend?"

My answer to that question wasn't a notorious teenage girl answer, either. (i.e. I'm not pretty enough, I'm not worth it, no one will love me because of my arthritis...)

Instead, I realized that I haven't had a boyfriend because of these two reasons:

1.) I have a list and no one "fits" that yet. I have a list of things I want in a future husband. A list that defines who I want to be the father of my children one day. It's lengthy, it's specific, and God has PROMISED to give me just what my heart longs for in that aspect of life just as He does in every other.

Psalm 37:4~ "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart."

2.) I'm not going to settle for anything less. God has created me in HIS image and likeness and He believes that I am worthy of a KING. I am fearfully and wonderfully made by a God who thinks the absolute world of me.

Psalm 139:14~ "I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows that full well."

I truly believe that your self-worth is as valuable as YOU make it. It comes from a belief that you ARE worthy. That you DO matter.

All I know is I've been bought with a price and I'm not going to settle for anything even close to less. God has something, and rather, SOMEONE so much better than "almost" or "second best."


The most beautiful part of it all is what God has said about my future...

Jeremiah 29:11~ "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you, and not to harm you; plans to give you a hope and a future."

I'm more than content with that. I want nothing else more than for God to have His way in my life fully and completely. 

He has it planned out so much better than I could ever dream or imagine.

13 comments:

Hillary said...

He sure does! I never had a boyfriend or even a real date in high school and I sometimes felt bad about it. But then I met a great guy the first week of college and we started dating. Now, 8.5 years later, we've been married almost 4 years and have a 1 year old! I never could've imagined my life could turn out this well! God is good! Keep up the good attitude and it will happen for you too!

Jen said...

You should never ever settle for less than what you deserve! Take this from someone who has had a few boyfriends, a failed marriage and currently an incredibly husband. You are too amazing of a person to settle.

Rachael said...

I love this post. I made 1000 mistakes in my young life all due to not guarding my heart in the right moments. At age 30 the mistakes still pop up and ruin my life some days. You are beautiful, don't sell yourself short!!

Melissa @ i carry your heart said...

This is sweet. I had my first boyfriend when I was 17 and he is now my hubby, so you just never know! :)

Meredith @ The Laundry Can Wait said...

Good for you, Kenz. If it makes you feel any better, I NEVER had a boyfriend until the summer after my freshman year in college. And he later became my husband. It's not about quantity, but QUALITY. Don't settle, for you simply have to get it right once. No other guy will be worth it.

I should tell you... If I had made a list, I'm sure my husband wouldn't have fit everything on it. I was a Christian, and he didn't even know what Easter was all about. But we were best friends, and I didn't give up on him. He'd later come to know the Lord, and we raise our kids in a faith-based household. Lists are good, but keep an open mind in case "the one" doesn't match up 100%. I know you'll make great decisions, though, as you have a mature head on your shoulders.

XO,
Meredith

becca said...

new follower

Elizabeth Mayberry said...

He does have a plan! I LOVE your heart!

Tiff Ima said...

Beautiful.

He knows exactly who he has for you!

Tiff Ima
http://stylehonestly.blogspot.com

Hayley said...

This post was exactly what I needed to see today! I made a list of what I wanted in a future husband a little over a year ago and God brought me a man that fulfilled every single one of those. Sadly, we didn't work out but I know that the Lord brought that man into my life to remind me that I am not forgotten. I also recite Psalm 37:4 and Jeremiah 29:11 like it's my job because I know that God will fulfill his promises!

Thanks so much for writing this post!

Jess said...

Oh my. WHY can't all girls your age think this way?! Kenzie, I can't tell you how encouraged I am by your heart for the Lord in this matter. How I wish I had figured this out when you did.. I know, without a doubt, that you will find the most amazing man.. because you're honoring the Lord and letting Him choose for you. Oh the things He will do through your marriage and family.. I cannot wait to see it!!

MrsV820 said...

Oh Kenzie I adored this post!!!! I never had a lot of boyfriends either for the same reason.
In fact I had only two boyfriends before I met my husband when I was 23 yrs old. And I am PROUD of that!!! I will not be conformed to this world!
Stay strong in this area.... He is soooo worth the (sometimes tedious and exhausting) wait.

I even started writing to my "future husband" before I even knew who he was. I just wrote what I was learning in The Lord and my hopes and dreams. I never put a name in it and never wrote with a guy a mind. I just wanted him to see who I was before We were together. I l loved it and felt like our souls connected somehow. I prayed for him and was completely content in Gods timing. (:
Once again proud of you!!!

Rachel said...

The scene you described reminded me of the time my now-husband and I were just friends, and he asked me, "Have you ever had a boyfriend?" I guess he knew me well enough already to kind of guess that I wasn't really the type to date around. My answer was no, and I had a little time at the moment to explain to him about why I wasn't interested in casual dating....I guess I was giving him a little info about the not-so-modern courtship that he was in for since he had a crush on me! A good man is worth waiting for, and I'm so happy that my husband was my first boyfriend!

Jamie Van Nuys said...

LOVE this. I foolishly dated losers in high school and let them determine my self-esteem, my actions, and how I treated others. The right man is out there, and indeed God is preparing him for you!!

Marriage is so worth the wait. And honestly, it is not worth your time dating losers when God already has your man picked out! The world will find something to pick on you about, but be encouraged that we are not held to that standard, but Christ's!